The Mommies, Esquire want to know if you’ve had any strange days. Well, today was just such a day for one of our Mommies, Esquire.
You ain't heard Superfreak 'till you've heard it bluegrass style....
Says Kim:
Most days blend right into the other. I can typically identify with Bill Murray’s character in Groundhog’s Day when he has the same day over and over and over again. However, things began to feel a little odd as of yesterday when we put our house on the market. I came home late from a Homeschool Support Group (more about this later) to find that the real estate agent had stuck one of his signs squarely in my front yard. Of course, I do want to sell our house, but seeing the sign feels strange.
I am a creature of habit, as is my husband and all three of our boys. That should tell you volumes.
Well, I woke up this morning to have my husband suggest that he take all three boys to school since he had his annual physical exam at 9:45 a.m. and had time to do so. Whoa!!!! All three? Are you sure? This didn’t happen since he decided to go have his blood drawn for his fasting blood tests and I took the boys for a healthy breakfast of doughnuts at the local bakery. But still….to offer was pretty nice, folks.
While getting doughnuts, a lady walked into the bakery wanting to order a King Cake for the upcoming weekend. However, she wanted no icing….no decorations….no filling….no baby for the inside. Just plain. A plain King Cake. The gracious owner didn’t say a word and just took the order. I would’ve asked, “What’s up with you?! It’s a freakin’ Mardi Gras King Cake! You’ve got to have green, purple and yellow icing…plus some sprinkles and a baby hidden inside. Don’t you even want some cream cheese filling? Who doesn’t love cream cheese? I would eat a stick if it has cream cheese on it.” She just ordered and walked out. What the?!! I would just give her a piece of bread and say, “Here’s your cake, lady.” But that’s just me. Who walks into a bakery and orders a plain cake? Who? Strange.
On the way out of the bakery, I saw a wolf pass in front of our van. He literally trotted out of the trees by the bakery and across the parking lot. No, it wasn’t a large dog….it was a wolf. I’ve been to the zoo enough to know one when I see one. No tail wagging. This was no domesticated pet let loose of some confines. No way, Jose. This was a wild animal. All I could think of was Meryl Streep in that movie screaming, “A dingo ate my baby!!!” I burned rubber getting out of the parking lot.
So, I decided to turn on my favorite independent local radio station. I like the funky mix of reggae to bluegrass offered. Today, I would not be disappointed. It was a local bluegrass band singing a banjo pickin’ version of …..Rick James’ Superfreak. Can I please tell you how strange it is to hear the twangy sound of country singers singing in a high lonesome sound, “She’s a very freaky girl….the kind you won’t take home to muther (throw in some dueling fiddles).” I didn’t know whether to be strangely amused or sort of disturbed.
If the day couldn’t get any stranger….I dropped off both of my youngest boys at preschool when my husband called to tell me to get back home in a flash. Someone has set up an appointment with our real estate agent to look at our home. Wow. We’ve had the house on the market for less than 24 hours and I’m having to get it ready for show. I dashed back home. I was a mad woman as I tried to stuff all of the dirty clothes into the laundry room, throw a dozen Hotwheels cars in a closet, spray Febreeze on anything and everything, brush up the carpet, raise the blinds, spray bleach in the shower, splash Lysol in the toilets, hide all “potty seats” and pray to God that no one looks in my closet because there will be an avalanche that could match the likes of something in the Swiss Alps.
Since I couldn’t return home for two hours, I decided to head to the coffee shop and hope my girlfriends were still there. One hour of chit-chat quickly became two hours and it was lunchtime. Didn’t I have a list a mile long to complete? Didn’t I have enough to do with running my mouth? Y-E-S!!!!!!!!!!!!! Before I left the coffee shop, the owner and my friend, Kelli suggested that I hear the muzak version of Rehab. I told her about the bluegrass Superfreak. She heard “Rehab” on an elevator a while back and it freaked her out. Hmmmm.
I found the elevator music version of Rehab on the internet and listened. My day was already weird. Why not add to it?
Plain King Cakes, Wolves, Bluegrass Superfreak, House Showings, Rehab on the elevator……strange days, indeed.
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You. Are. FABULOUS.